Let go. Connect more.

If someone were to ask, “Matt, if there was one thing that someone could do transform their life, what would that be?” Let me preface this with the fact that if you really want to live an extraordinary life, there are many things you need to do, however, there are certain things which give you a much bigger “bang for your buck.”  One of the greatest lessons I have learned is that of connection – connection with myself and connection with others.  We spend so much time “connecting” to computers, cell phones, iPads, and Wifi hotspots, we have essentially lost the ability to connect with ourselves and the people around us.  In the past, there was little technology so people were actually forced to talk to each other.  Imagine that! If they did not want to talk to anybody, their only choice was to seek within and have an internal dialogue with themselves.  How terrible that would be! Now, we trade meditation and observing our thoughts for Facebook and Youtube.  We trade connecting and learning from the people around us for Candy Crush and Angry Birds.  Time with friends is spent staring at a phone and family time is traded for computer games and e-mail.  Opportunities to connect with people have never been greater yet we have never been more distracted and disconnected.

From my perspective, this crisis of a lack of human connection is not going to get any better.  Our distractions become even more plentiful everyday and take us away from the things that really change people’s lives like communication and relationships.  Interestingly, as the distractions become more abundant and human connection becomes even more rare, your ability to connect and effectively communicate is even more influential and impactful than ever before.  Imagine the surprise on someone’s face when someone actually listened to them.  Imagine the joy that would be created in the lives of your children if you put down the phone and laptop and gave them your undivided attention.  Imagine the fulfillment that would occur in a relationship if you created the connection and intensity that nothing else in the world mattered except that moment when you two are together.  Imagine the feeling your customers would have if you actually listened with an open mind and a compassionate heart with absolutely no judgment.  Imagine if you actually sat in silence for 10-15 minutes per day and just observed your own thoughts, how much you would learn about yourself.  How many of you sit for 10-15 minutes per day in complete silence journaling or meditating in order to cultivate a better relationship with yourself?  How many of you do that with your spouse, your friends, and your children?  In a world where people are so disconnected from everyone around them including themselves, could you imagine the impact that giving someone 100% of yourself, of your attention, of your compassion, of your empathy, and of your love for even just a few minutes would have on their day?  You would be giving someone the rarest commodity there is nowadays – connection. 

In order to connect with people on the highest level, you must first begin by connecting with yourself.  Sit in meditation, read, journal, take a day just for yourself, and even take a holiday alone.  This will allow you to communicate with the most important person in your life – yourself.  Also, the greatest thing you can do to connect with other people is to become genuinely interested in them.  Listen to them.  Pay attention to their needs, wants, and desires.  Every moment of everyday is an opportunity to connect with yourself and the people around you.  Let us both commit to distracting ourselves less and listening to our inner dialogue more; less talking and more listening; less taking and more giving; less emotional barriers and more opening of our heart; and less judging and more unconditional love.  Not only will this change your life, but it will create a ripple effect that will touch more lives than you could possibly imagine.  The beautiful thing is you can start now.  Just close your laptop, put away your phone, and shut off your iPad, and begin connecting. 

Love,

Matt